Deep Thinker

Pharyngula: Great pelagic orgies!

He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt;
the girls all think he's weird.
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
and sports a scraggly beard.
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
It cost him fifteen quid.
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
'cause he's
hung like a squid.

He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
and tries to pull the geeks.
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
unwashed for forty weeks.
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
for fashion? Gods forbid!
He wears his Lovecraft T-shirt
'cause he's
hung like a squid.

The HP Lustcraft email told him all he'd need to know:
"The symbol on your shirt is sexy—squid are Big Below.
Ten tentacles will tell your temptress of your special size!"
Our luckless loser finally figured—
spam's full of lies.


So now...

He wears his Melville T-shirt,
but only once a week.
His nights are filled with nymphets
all drawn to his physique.
He learned to lure the ladies,
So let's not call him thick.
He wears his Melville T-shirt
'cause his
brain's in his Dick.