Thursday, May 04, 2006

Dwarfs of Mystic Design

Pharyngula: Needs pygmies

We three Dwarfs of Mystic Design,
Deeply delve, quotations to mine,
Fortune telling, query quelling,
Vacuously divine.

O, Dwarfs with faith and Dwarfs with fight,
Dwarfs who'll make all learning rite,
Darkness dwelling, books bestselling,
We don't need no steenkin' light.

When we coached a Philippine judge,
Gave his thoughts a prescient nudge,
Why attack him? Why'd they sack him?
Obvious godless grudge.

O, Dwarfs with faith and Dwarfs with fight,
Dwarfs who'll make all learning rite,
Darkness dwelling, profit swelling,
We don't need no steenkin' light.

Long we fought to sweeten the schools
Soured by bitter Lemon-y rules;
Tasty panda propaganda
Couldn't persuade the fools.

O, Dwarfs with faith and Dwarfs with fight,
Dwarfs who'll make all learning rite,
Darkness dwelling, bullshit smelling,
We don't need no steenkin' light.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Gardy-ewwww!

Pharyngula: A Query from New Mexico

When Behe appears, best cover your ears,
and that goes for Dembski, too--
Lest sewage rain down and splatter your crown,
with nary a "Gardy-loo*!"

No need to eat mice to know they're not nice;
no need for a mud buffet--
When madmen come out to bellow and shout,
It's prudent to run away.

* Gardy-loo: Warning commonly shouted before emptying slops (the contents of a chamberpot, for instance) from a high window, derived from the French garde l'eau.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Above Criticism

Pharyngula: Hi, Daryl!

Hey Daryl, what's free speech to you?
Does it mean any fool with a view
Gets religion's free pass
To speak out of his ass,
While to counter his lies is taboo?

[Update: I should have looked before I blogged--both of us hitting Daryl and both in limerick style.]

Share Snacks, Not Complaints

Pharyngula: Hi, Daryl!

Since Daryl's so willing to share
We've all felt the blast of hot air:
"According to me,
all speech should be free
(though maybe not public,
if I don't agree)"--
Says Daryl: "It's simply not fair!"

(Virge (Phunicular) once referred to this sort of thing as a "stretch limerick." Me, I call it "lazy"--I may still fit into my prom dress, but I can't confine my invective to five lines. Shame on me.)